GUIDELINE FOR MUSLIM PARENTS:

COMMUNICATION

To manage a family with minimal conflict, energy and stress there has to be effective communication between all members of the family. As parents, this is something we have to teach and monitor on an ongoing basis until all family members get it right. The kind of communication that you have with your kids while they are young is the kind of communication that id likely to stay between you unless
a conscious effort is made to correct the problem.

Communications between family members are basically of three types:
· One way
· Argumentative
· Two way

At the same time we must impart to members of our house hold the Islamic etiquettes pertaining to communicating with each other, like:

· Kindness to each other
· Do not become angry
· Do not call each other by offensive names
· Be willing to forgive

The Prophet (SAW) reminds us,
“Allah is kind and loves kindness in all affairs.”

A technique for managing our anger is outlined with the following hadith:
“When one of you is standing and becomes angry he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good, otherwise, he should lie down.” (Ahmad and Tirmidhi)

GUIDELINE FOR MUSLIM PARENTS:

BASICS
Families become dysfunctional because they move away from the basics. When we move away from the basics we erode the foundations upon which family life is built. Here are few basics you should be emphasizing:

a) Pray together

The Messenger of God said,
“What lies between a person and disbelief is the abandonment of prayers.” (Muslim)

b) Eat at least one meal together each day

The Messenger of God said,
“Eat together and not separately, for the blessing is associated with company”. (Ibn Maja)

c) Do not practice favoritism amongst your children

The Messenger of God said,
“Treat your children equally, treat your children equally, treat your children equally,”(Ahmad)

GUIDELINE FOR MUSLIM PARENTS:

ACCOUNTABILITY
A common mistake parents make is to teach their kids to be accountable to them, rather than to be accountable to Allah first and foremost. If you teach your children that you are primarily accountable to Allah, they know that Allah and His recording angels see and record all that they do even when you’re not around to see what they are doing.

To achieve this teach your children using relevant concepts and principles from the Quran and Hadith. Some examples are:

“Serve Allah as you would if you could see Him; although you cannot see Him, He can see you.” (Muslim)

“Fear Allah wherever you are, and follow up a bad deed with a good one and it will wipe it out, and behave well towards people.” (Tirmidhi)

IMPORTANCE OF SAUM, FASTING.

Siyaam, fasting,is among the fundamental acts of ibaadat. It has been ordained by Allah for the development of taqwa in the Maumineen. Fasting is extremely efficaciousfor the acquisition of Taqwa. A muslim cannot acquire Divine proximity without taqwa. Without Taqwa, the muslim must necessarily drift far off the straight peth, Sirat-ul-Mustaqeem, which leads to Allah and everlasting success in the Aakhirat. One who denies the fardhiat, obligation, of Saum, no longer remains a muslimand the one who does not fastduring the month of Ramadan is a Faasiq, an immoral and flagrant transgressor, of the highest order. Such a Faasiq totallydestroys his spirituality and morality and exposes hid Imaan to the gravest onslaught of Kufr.